COVID drain

November 16, 2020 Torrey Smith

8 months into this thing and I have lately really been feeling it. My schedule feels chopped up, my focus eroded, my willpower shrinking, my desire to escape the discomfort persistent.

One thing that has been helping is to try and frame more of my experience with an understanding that this will not go on forever. This will go on for another 6-9 months — we’re half-way through. Much like Vegas, we can invite what happens in COVID to stay in COVID. I do not have to let these 18 months define me as a person or an artist. I am hoping this gives me permission to, well, lower my expectations a bit and to frame them in the practical realities of my life right now. These include:

i am happier when I’m making art, but am really struggling against the pressure to make good art. How do I keep the art-making playful and positive right now?
my COVID schedule is much more chopped up than my normal schedule. How do I work within that instead of fighting it all the time?
my attention span and will are both weaker than normal

So… I’ve been thinking of what I AM enjoying — portraits, and preferring the painting of the people to be in oil; patterns and colors — enjoying the speed of the acrylics’ dry time; making small pieces which take less time to complete; life drawing I have been playing with while subbing at the schools.

My goal for the next few weeks is to try and have fun mashing these together in different ways — and try to keep it fun by keeping the stakes and expectations low, if I can. I want to be able to take risks and not worry about “messing up.” Here are two efforts:

COVID Portraits

November 4, 2020 Torrey Smith

I hung the third set of portraits at the Village Market today. It’s not necessarily an ideal setup, but it good to try new things and I’ve gotten some nice feedback. And while COVID rages on, it continues to be one of the few places that has stayed open throughout.

Playing with pattern -- and acrylics again

October 28, 2020 Torrey Smith

Enjoying the fast drying and ease of acrylics for creating these patterns. Struggling a bit with the fast drying with the figures b/c you mix a good color and go back to use it elsewhere only to find it has dried already … Plus, the fast drying lets me go back in to touch things up — but it’s too hard to keep the touch light and spare… and things soon become overworked. Still, some good experimentation…

These are all acrylic on panel, 12x12”. I think finished or almost finished…

Exploring something a little different

September 15, 2020 Torrey Smith

I always take the summer off of painting because the girls are home and it’s too hard to stay focused with so many people and logistics in and out every day. Even though COVID made it a much quieter summer than normal, I was ready for a break from the portraits by the time school ended in late June.

But, back to painting last week! As always, the first few days (weeks? gah, I hope not!) back after a hiatus don’t feel great. But, you can’t get to the good stuff till after you’ve ripped off the bandaid of awkward first, so that’s well in the works at least.

I’m thinking I’m going to work in acrylics for awhile again, and play with some figure painting, but have it be less portrait-y. I’d also like to play with pattern and stencils. I love fabric patterns and color and have been curious about how I could integrate those loves more into my work… without actually switching over to fabric. One of my students is a whiz with stencils and she gave me a little tutorial this past Sunday. Here’s some initial exploration — 12x12” working with acrylics, from a photo I took of my niece and nephew a few weeks ago:

Now I have to wait for the stencils I ordered online to arrive so I can keep going :-D

COVID Portraits Are Up!

September 1, 2020 Torrey Smith

Just hung the first installment of COVID portraits at the Village Market in Waterbury.

Yes, I know it’s a little odd to hang art in a supermarket. But right now, it’s one of the few places that’s open a lot, easy to access and with room for anyone who’d like to be there.

I am also drawn to the idea that even people who don’t think of themselves as “artsy” will have the chance to stumble on these and make a connection with the images unexpectedly.

There will be three boards, each with 9 images on them. Each one will hang for a month, so September through November. The market is open every day from 8AM to 8PM; the paintings are right up in the front of the store, between the customer service area and the big windows. Please stop by to check them out!

Zoom Becky

April 21, 2020 Torrey Smith

My friend Becky has generously allowed me to use her as a model in several of my paintings. Somehow I always feel, however, like I don't capture her spirit. We set up a zoom call last week to have tea and catch up a bit. While we talked, I snapped a few screenshots and then asked if I could paint them.

Zoom Becky Suite, 2020. Each piece is oil on 6x6” panel. — *Zoom Becky Suite*, 2020. Each piece is oil on 6x6” panel.

Somehow, I feel like this does start to capture Becky. I’ve been trying to understand the difference — why does it feel like it’s working now, when it hasn’t before? My current theory is that Becky is a person who is always in movement and her animation is really elemental to how I see her. By doing a few of these photos and putting them together, it feels like maybe it gets at some of her mobile self.

Lemonade

April 13, 2020 Torrey Smith

I’ve been trying to roll with the corona homestay in a mellow way — trying not to get too panicked about the pandemic and also trying not to put too much pressure on myself to accomplish something meaningful during this time. I have definitely been indulging in staying up late with a book, eating lots of warm-from-the-oven bread, and ignoring to-do lists. But I don’t want to be a complete sloth and totally miss this opportunity to explore things in a low-key, private way.

Taking a walk on the road at the end of March, I stopped to talk with a neighbor I hadn’t seen in quite a while. As we talked, I had the idea that maybe I could ask him if I could snap a photo and then paint him. He was totally open to it, so I went ahead and used my phone to just get a picture of him bundled up in his winter work clothes, bright orange watch cap and all.

In the weeks since, I’ve been painting people I encounter in my quarantine travels as an organizing principle for my studio practice. So, as I go for walks on my road or head into town to the store, I’ve been asking folks I see, but wouldn’t necessarily think of as close friends, if I can snap their photos, and then using them for photo sources back in my studio.

My neighbor Alison was biking on trails around our road — but found too much snow to really enjoy it

Damian was restocking shelves at the local market

Our neighbor Doug delivered two dozen fresh eggs to us, with his son Ripley

It’s been good practice — not only for the faces, but the asking too. I had had an idea for a project in the fall that would have relied on reaching out to people I didn’t really know, in a similar way, but my discomfort with that had gotten in the way of getting it done. Also, I’d wondered how much I could like a portrait that was just from a snapshot — would it be able to capture much of their personality, their likeness? I think these do capture some important parts of the people. I’ve been sharing them with the folks after I paint them, and so far they’ve responded pretty positively.

Quarantine

April 2, 2020 Torrey Smith

Vermont’s governor locked down the state pretty early in the Corona response and I moved a painting kit home and cleared out our guest/laundry room in late March. I couldn’t decide between oils or acrylics, so brought home both. But, in an effort to try and give myself some boundaries (too often, no boundaries is overwhelming and paralyzing), I only brought 6x6” gessobords and decided I would limit myself to those. I thought I would take this time to focus on portraits.

I started using some photographs I had already collected from friends — pictures of their husbands and kids and decided to start with the oils:

It finally feels like the portraits are starting to come together without so much struggle, though of course, they all still seem to go through a stage of despair before a final rescue and pull-together toward resolution/conclusion.

Face time

January 8, 2020 Torrey Smith

Have been having fun these last few weeks working on small portraits using photos sent to me by friends and family. These are all 6x6” in oils:

There’s always so much to practice and so much to keep in mind. I’ve been trying to focus on keeping my heart light as I do it (listening to funny books on tape helps) and thinking about process — the steps to take to develop the image in a way that feels both intuitive and effective. I’m pleased with the outcomes of these, but still not feeling that the process feels like me.

I love the initial stages of the underpainting, where I’m just putting in a single color on a toned background, drawing it on with paint and then literally pushing and pulling the paint around with my brush till I get the shapes the way I want them.

I love that tactile sensibility, almost like sculpting with the paint… then when I start putting the colors on it starts to feel like a fight with the paint, which wants to mix with anything it touches and start to get thick and muddy or, even worse, have a hard time staying on the canvas. Is there a way to work with the wet paint but be able to continue the relaxed feeling of the first stage and its forgiving nature once I get into colors…?

It's a small world after all

December 18, 2019 Torrey Smith

So yes, painting Medusa is a sign that I’m working on some unpleasant stuff in my own head. We all have days and weeks like that. But then sometimes I get tired of being in my own head, and that can bring painting to a near standstill. I’d been heading that way as we moved towards Thanksgiving and I was trying to do some thinking about how to feel better about what’s been happening in my studio work.

I’ve re-directed myself for a bit, back to painting “smalls” — in this case, 6x6” gessoed panels that paint up in a day. They let me push paint around and play with color and composition and all the technical stuff of painting, so there’s tons of learning and skill development and rich practice. And, because they don’t take a lot of time or resources, the stakes are low enough that there’s not a lot of pressure to get everything perfect, which means I’m more likely to try new things and push my own limits a bit.

I’m interested in pursuing two paths — one that’s a variant on a still life and one that’s portraits — or at least studies for portraits. It’d be great to try this approach for a couple months and see where it leads. Here are a few images from the last couple weeks:

Snakebit

December 2, 2019 Torrey Smith

I’m fascinated with Medusa lately. Admit it: don’t you ever find yourself so frustrated or angry that you’d just as soon turn a person to stone to get what you wanted or to stop what they’re doing? How many times do we say something that we know to be spiteful or mean-spirited… and yet let it fly from our mouths despite the possibly damaging consequences of the words? I think we all have some Medusa inside us…

Medusa Has A Tantrum, in process

16x20, acrylic

Medusa's Timeout, in process

24x30”, acrylic

Unconditional, in process

24x36”, acrylic

Portrait Suites

September 26, 2019 Torrey Smith

I’ve been doing these at a workshop, a super-fun, intense week of work in Gloucester, MA. Here are the next two efforts at the suites:

Tamatha Suite (2019)… Acrylic on panel. 6x6,” 6x6” and 6x12” — *Tamatha Suite* (2019)… Acrylic on panel. 6x6,” 6x6” and 6x12”

9AM, Monday (2019)… Acrylic on panel. 6x6,” 6x6” and 6x12” — *9AM, Monday* (2019)… Acrylic on panel. 6x6,” 6x6” and 6x12”

Trying a different approach

September 24, 2019 Torrey Smith

At a workshop this week, trying to think about how to weave together some almost-successful (but not quite) portrait attempts from the last year. How to create a portrait that has a complicated feel, a sense of narrative… but is not so heavy-handed in its storytelling that the viewer feels like their being bludgeoned with message?

I painted an image of my friend Becky, who is on the verge of empty nesting after 20+ years of full time parenting at the residency this spring. Even though I liked the picture technically, it felt too static, a little over-done…

Here’s another take:

Becky Suite (2019), acrylic on panel, 8x8” and 6x6”

Summer's End

September 15, 2019 Torrey Smith

I don’t paint much during the summer and the return to the studio in the fall is always a little nerve-wracking. I eased myself in by painting some little pictures of my girls enjoying summer: